I have always thought myself to be quite intelligent, but lately the odd bouts of anxiety surrounding my wedding day make me think that I got the wrong message my whole life. To begin let’s look at the classic movies that I grew up loving and watching daily. We will start with my favorite Alice in Wonderland. Alice was so sick of the way the normal world was that she wanted her own world where everything was different. "If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?” Oh the wisdom that girl had. She wasn’t a princess and could care less about a “prince”…she just didn’t want to listen to her history lesson. Then of course there is the OCD rabbit who, just like me, is obsessed with the time. But no worry about princesses or weddings, just silliness and a good lesson in getting somewhere on time.
Then there was Ariel from the Little Mermaid. Ariel never really wanted to be a bride…she just wanted to walk on land. And who can blame her…that fish smell had to be getting to her. And her best friend was a crab! Lame! I hope she walked right to a bath tub and got to scrubbing. J
Then of course there is Dorothy from the Wizard of OZ…she just wanted to get home. No princes in this one. And Heidi the little girl that lived on the mountain, she just wanted to see her Grandfather again.
I always thought that the skexies from Dark Crystal were awesome! I mean...come on...check him out!
I also loved Jem and the Holograms...Jem was the coolest role model ever! For those of you who didn’t watch this show…think animated Hannah Montana…only Jem could switch herself by touching her earrings. Jem was just a really cool girl…yeah she had a boyfriend but he could be ditched at anytime. Girl Power was very evident in all of these Disney movies. Well the ones I watched anyway.
Now let’s get to the movie that apparently that has made girls suffer from Bridal Retardation for years…our Dear friend Cinderella. Apparently I missed the message of this movie. Out of this one I figured out that a goal and hard work (even when people treat you bad) will get you what you want. Cinderella didn’t want to go to the ball to meet the prince…the girl was just wanting to get out of the house and have a good time. She wanted to have a drink and dance and talk to a human…hey mice are great company but sometimes human interaction just can’t be beat. Besides the wedding scene only accounts for the last minute of the movie. The girl to the left here is the Cinderella I liked!
So why are all the girls in the world so obsessed with being a bride? Or was it the movie Princess Bride? This one I never saw until I was 22 years old and was highly disappointed. The princess was a weak pathetic character…why would anyone want to be like her? I don’t know…is it the dress? The need to have the world revolve around you for a day? I just can’t understand why girls like weddings so much.
I sit here this morning freaked out because my wedding day is fast approaching. Nothing about this day seems pleasing…that is until it’s over and I get to drink wine with all of my best friends. I have no idea how I can stand in front of hundreds of people and give a speech or talk to random strangers everyday with no feelings of stress or discomfort…but this….OMG how will I get through this. I have thought of a million things that I would rather do. Tattoo Marc’s name on my forehead is up there. I really really really am dreading my wedding day. Everything about it seems unnatural and forced. I do NOT want to walk past and then stand in front of my family, friends and worst of all strangers and make such an emotional and sacred vow. I truly feel that this is private thing and should be treated as such…why are we parading it in front of everyone. The spotlight of this makes me feel as though I am making a date to have everyone we know watch us have sex. I just can’t get past the fact that none of the people who will attend the wedding will be a part of our marriage. It is just Marc and I! So why does there have to be so much pomp and circumstance?
……………door bell rings………………Oh my wedding dress just arrived!…………open box…..it’s pretty……………try it on………….NNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! It is hideous. Well it is 4 sizes too big and looks like a prom dress from Lane Bryant. Ok I am overreacting and it will probably be beautiful once it is altered to fit one person instead of two! And before anyone says it…I did already think about gaining weight to make it fit. Sadly my metabolism is too good and there isn’t enough junk food in the world to make me that big that fast.
Today just isn’t my day…at least when it comes to wedding stuff. So I am going to head off to work now and hope that the rest of my day improves. Thanks for letting me vent! J
Honey, the reason you have a wedding (well, one of them, anyway: the one nobody tells you about) is so that all the older people who love you can relive the profound emotion of their own "moment" with you as we have yours. And the people who hope to have that kind of love and haven't found it, yet, can get inspired to look for it. Like funerals, weddings are for the guests. And we all get to stand around and be happy that, on most days...if not this particular one...you are happy with each other. It's a celebration of life. And people send you gifts and money, too. And they all remember all the dumb things that went haywire at their weddings and how foolish they felt until the actual moment of the vows took place, which made up for absolutely everything, no matter what it was...and they remember that haywire stuff FONDLY. Now, that's magic! Better than Disney. It's about love, which is messy. Love you, too!
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